Being Majesty: Why I stopped writing.

This would be the first time in two years that I would be writing; I never knew the break would take this long.

Why are you not writing; would be one of the most asked questions I have been asked. From giving school excuses to work load, how I lied and no Mary, I wasn’t building content either. Content! How did I come up with that?

I was scared of the words that poured as I wrote. My writing is my art, it is who I am when I stare, when I gaze keenly, it is me exhaling so when it came to growing her, I got scared.

She wasn’t humorous anymore; she became dark and filled with melancholia. That shit scared me. My then new inspiration came from a hidden pain I knew nothing of except that it showed in my art, a character of perceived pain popped up each time I wrote so much so that the more I wrote the stronger it became. Something was feeding it and I wouldn’t want to be the one. And so I stopped.

While I was discovering myself, the me in my center where all energy flows from, I learnt something new about me. I am a soulful being, I am eccentric, I am expressive of emotions, I am deep, I am a spiritual being and I am dark in a good kind of way.*no brain picking*.

It took me 2 years to have faith in my writing. Even now with my confidence, I doubt I wouldn’t get stuck along the way. So I was revolting with who I am becoming. While others may have rainbows and sunflowers, my art handed me flames that wouldn’t die out and soon it burnt the old box until there was nothing holding me down.

Discovering me came with tears, it came with anger and it came with losing those I love my only regret is that I didn’t embrace the beauty of my gift in the way it should be.

So I name her MAJESTY for I would wear, brush her, hold her and grow her.

 

This is to fulfilling MAJESTY for She calls.

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